Sitting with Your Twesties (Making Twitter Lists)

Twesties (noun): Your Twitter besties (AKA best friends). You adore them and they adore you; you talk almost every time you’re on Twitter.

In my humble opinion, making lists is VITAL to having a good Twitter experience. Here are my top 3 reasons why:

1. Different strokes, different folks. In life you’re friends with different people for different reasons, right? I call my oldest friends when I need trusted perspectives (they know my life story!), I call my “fun” friends when I need a night out, and I call my know-it-all friends when I need advice about which computer to get. Why should your Twitter friends be any different? While some of your “Twesties” do it all (just like your real-life best friends), you keep other Tweeps around for more specific purposes: some make you laugh, some keep you up to date on the latest news, some provide you with great reading material, and some teach you how to do really freakin’ cool things. They drive in distinct lanes, so give them their own lists.

2. Sit with your Twesties. As your follower number becomes larger and larger, it gets harder to really connect with your Tweeps. I wish that I could have in-depth conversation with all of my 3,557 followers, but there just isn’t enough time in the day! That’s why it’s so important for you to create a list of your favorite Tweeps — your Twesties! You can cut through the clutter and stay in touch with the people who matter, the people who have been in your Twitter corner since the early days of your account. While I’ve seen lists like this set to “public,” I prefer to keep mine “private.” My Twesties already know that they’re my faves! *HINT: People don’t know when you’ve added them to a private list.

3. Better Following/Follower Gap. One of the best things about Twitter lists is that you can put someone on a list without actually following them! In my “Teach Me How to Twitter” series, I’ve talked at length about the importance of maintaining a reasonable following/follower gap. If people see that you’re following a ton of people who aren’t following you back, they may not opt to follow you. Can you blame them? You don’t exactly look like the belle of the ball. While I still follow certain causes/people (NOW, Sea Shepherd, Gloria Steinem) that/who I know will never follow me back, I want to support them by adding to their Twitter follower numbers. Others, like CNN, I just stick on a list. *HINT: Only tweets from the people you’re actually following come up on your main Twitter feed. Adding people who you don’t want to follow — but whose tweets you still want to read — to lists is a great idea; this way, you’re able to read all of the tweets you want without clogging your main Twitter feed.

I always feel like making your own lists is the best policy; however, you can also follow (“subscribe” to) lists made by other accounts. I’ve made some seriously fun lists for @BallpointNews, so you can check them out if you want to take your list education a bit further. (Obviously, we’d also love you for following us.)

I didn’t get into the how-tos of making Twitter lists because that would be a little too technical for my blog. If you click here, Twitter will teach you how!

Happy listing, Tweeps!

Review: Evangeline’s Miracle

My rating: ***

*Creating something that will appeal to the masses is the hardest part of writing. That being said, I want to preface this review by noting that there was an “ick factor” that I couldn’t get over. To some people, the twist that served as my “ick factor” might be a nonissue. For me, it quite frankly ruined the vision of the couple I had been following from the first page. Luckily, it came at the very end, so I was able to get lost in the book up until that point.

My review: In Evangeline’s Miracle, Evangeline Lacroix becomes consumed by the plight of a mysterious apparition. As she crusades to change the unfortunate circumstances that marked this spirit’s life, Evangeline’s own life spirals out of control. She has a tragedy to fix, a slew of Mommy issues to get over, and a marriage to save. Yeah, she’s got a lot going on.

As a World Literary Cafe reviewer, I chose Evangeline’s Miracle for two reasons: it sounded unusual and I’m a sucker for anything historical. I’m happy to report that it succeeded in both areas. The plot was much more original than I had anticipated; in fact, I’ve never read anything quite like it before. Anyone who reads books with a historical edge knows that they are sometimes ill-researched to the point where you feel completely removed from the story. Lisa Buie-Collard seems to have done a fairly good job researching the time period in which the Sobieski family lived. Consequently, I thoroughly enjoyed getting lost in their lives, often wondering what their daily routines were like, which societal codes they followed, etc.

I also liked Lisa Buie-Collard’s writing style, so I’m looking forward to reading more from her in the future. While she’s got one Hell of an imagination, she needs to reign it in at times; this book could have easily become a series. When I finished it, I felt like I had just read two books in one. The first (and arguably more important) climax should probably have been dragged out a little longer in order to make the plot a tad more fluid.

Final word: This book is that classic “easy read” that you can knock out in a couple of days while being happily engrossed in a life that’s not your own.

Hey, Twitter Is NOT eHarmony!

Twirting (verb): The act of flirting via Twitter.

If you saw The Social Network, you know that it controversially implies that Facebook was created as a way for the good old Harvard boys to meet attractive women. While Mr. Zuckerberg denies that claim, it’s common knowledge that flirting and dating have always been an unabashed part of the social networking scene.

As it is and ever has been, social media blurs the line of intimacy. Recently, I read a post titled “What Is Your Strategy for Social Media Intimacy?” To be fair, it was aimed at businesses or people with some kind of product or agenda to push; however, I was shocked that the writer gave Twitter a lousy 1, the lowest score for intimacy. The reason? The 140 character limit. I’m sorry, but anyone who is into Twitter knows that it can get at least as intimate as Facebook (scored a 7). What’s the most important difference between the two? On Twitter you share your life with perfect strangers while on Facebook, you share your life with friends, relatives, and acquaintances.

However, I beg to disagree. I’m the first to admit that I never would have thought that I could feel so close to people I’ve never met! We inquire after the other’s health, celebrate successes big and small, and trade tips about getting olive oil stains out of our couches. How is that not a friendship? How is asking how someone’s chemo is going NOT an intimate thing?

It is a friendship, it is intimate — but it’s also virtual. You don’t know the first names of this person’s parents, you don’t know what their voice sounds like, and hell, you don’t even know if their Twitter name is their REAL name. (For all you know, I could be 75 year-old man who lives in Japan!) To a certain extent, we’re all friends with our Tweep and Blogger friends’ personas, rather than the persons themselves.

Maybe that’s not a bad thing.

What is a bad thing? Feeling too intimate with someone you don’t know and crossing that invisible line. (You know, the one that is in different places for different people.) As in real life, being too “forward” or inappropriate can have consequences. On the receiving side, support or attention from a virtual friend can masquerade as real life intimacy. Caring, however, does not equal an invitation to twirt with them. Do you really want to risk alienating someone with whom you’ve spent the past few months building a rewarding intellectual relationship? Of course not! So why go there?

How do you know if you’ve taken it too far?:

1. You would NEVER say that to someone’s face. Why? Because a drink or punch would be thrown at yours.
2. You would be embarrassed if your mom read that tweet or DM. (Do you kiss your mama with that mouth?)
3. You just said something that was off topic, non-sequitor, or just plain creepy. Why would you randomly say something like “I like your face” to a tweet about someone’s new humidifier? NO ONE WAS EVEN FLIRTING WITH YOU. I’m going to block you for being creepy — or just plain crazy.

If someone has made you uncomfortable:

I say block, block, and block. This person clearly has bad judgment. Sure you can give them a good talkin’ to and see if they change. I personally don’t have time for that when a repeat performance is almost guaranteed. This isn’t a person from your real life, so who cares if you go for the jugular and kick them to the curb without an explanation. Trust me, they’ll figure it out.

Final word:

The veil of anonymity can encourage bold and bad behaviors. We’re people, people! Be nice. Do doubt yourself and do exercise restraint — or it may come back to haunt you. Don’t believe me? Just ask ex-Representative Weiner.

When a Friend”ship” Sinks

I think that a lot of my followers have sensed that I’ve been a little out of sorts lately. Well, to certain extent, you’re right. The truth is that I’ve been hurting.

One of my best friends moved out of the state 9 months ago and basically stopped caring. This was not your typical growing apart, it was literally like night and day. She went from swearing to call me and our other best friend, @AlaynaTea, as soon as she landed to ignoring 99.9% of all of our calls, texts, Facebook messages, etc. There was no good reason for this (she wasn’t in jail, injured, sick, or even abducted by aliens), she apparently just wanted to live her life and “do her” in her new environment. I talked to my ex-friend best for a lousy 5 minutes within a 9 month period; we were friends for four years.  When something major happened in my life, I texted her, asking her to call me because it was important. That call never came and now, months later, she has been blowing up my public (seriously, this kind of thing should be private) Facebook wall with apologies, inside jokes, and even promises that she talks about me all of the time.

I don’t care, I’m not appeased, and I’m certainly not amused. If this person was truly sorry, I think that they would have sent a card or left a heartfelt message, apologizing for not knowing what I’ve been going through for 9 months. Some of you out there may tell me to give her the benefit of the doubt, that life gets crazy and people forget to reach out. Maybe I am the stubborn hardass that everyone says I am. I don’t know, but I can’t bring myself to forgive her. I need to let her know that it’s way too little, way too late and that our friendship has been at the bottom of the ocean for quite some time now. I still don’t know how I’m going to tackle this, but I’m finally accepting the reality of the situation- someone who once felt like family is now little more than a stranger to me. It’s scary, sad, and is making me develop those “trust” issues that I have never before had the displeasure to know.

I lost my childhood best friend to death, and this feels a lot like it. In fact, it’s safe to say that I’ve gone through the 5 Stages of Grief (Elisabeth Kübler Ross):

Denial: “Maybe she’s in jail.” “She’ll call soon, she’s probably just really busy; people are busy for 4 months straight, right?” “Aha, her phone must be broken…again.”

Anger: “After all we’ve been through, she doesn’t even have the decency to call me back when I need her!” “She had the ugliest hair that I have ever seen in my entire life! It was GERRRRR-OSS! ” “I HATE THAT ___ ____ ___!”

Bargaining: “God, if she calls within the next 24 hours, I swear I’ll forgive her.” “If she has a REALLY good reason, it’ll be water under the bridge.” “I’ll put her on probation, and maybe, after a lot of groveling, our friendship will be the same one day.”

Depression: “How could someone I trusted and loved do this to me?” “Did I do something that hurt her? Has our friendship been a sham?” “But she was supposed to be in my wedding!”

Acceptance: “I’m so glad that I know what kind of person she REALLY is; it’s way better to know now, rather than later!” “I was fine before I met her, and I’m doing fine without her.” “There are so many other people who care about me just as much as I care about them.”

For those of you who haven’t reached the coveted “Acceptance” stage, here are the top 5 ways to get through it:

1. Talk it out, cry it out, scream it out. Do whatever you can to get some of those emotions out of your system and into the universe.
2. Give yourself a “get out of jail free” card. It’s sometimes ok to throw yourself your own pity party and this is one of those rare cases. After all, someone you loved just stomped on your heart and may or may not have apologized for it on your Facebook wall. They’ve disappointed you, and you’re disappointed in yourself for ever letting that Trojan horse into your home. It looked like such a harmless package at the time!
3. Make yourself two playlists. Make an angry one (include: Brand New’s “Seventy Times 7“) and a sad one (include: Joni Mitchell’s “Blue“).
4. Mess with your pictures. Use a Paint-esque program to do terrible things to your ex-friend. Remember that adorable picture of you two on your birthday? You’ll be amazed at how much better your ex-friend looks with a pitchfork and Devil horns! It’s a much more fitting and natural look! Trust me, it’s seriously therapeutic.
5. Celebrate this blessing in disguise. This weekend, after I officially end this friendship, I am going out with my bestie, @AlaynaTea. We are going to drink to the fact that while we didn’t completely dodge the bullet that was our friend, we both got out with mere flesh wounds. We’ll also drink to each other’s friendship, because that ship is still happily afloat.

Tweeps and bloggers, I wish you all smooth sailing! Thanks in advance for your kind words and support. <3 <3 <3

Ick…New Twitter

My Twitter account switched over this past Wednesday and it was traumatic.

Am I being a tad dramatic? Maybe. However, this is the second or third time Twitter has undergone a massive overhaul since summer. This is beyond annoying for everyone, but it’s way worse for me. I had just finished writing my next “Teach Me How to Twitter” blog post, a detailed post about hashtags. To put it nicely, I now have to rewrite it.

I hate new Twitter, but I have to deal with it. So do you.

My favorite coping advice comes from my good Twitter friend, @GayleCochrane:

@Call_Me_Bookish When going through the “Twitter change” it is best to take a deep breath, and then eat a piece of chocolate. Repeat.

@Call_Me_Bookish I’ve actually been telling people to lean right and close one eye, then it looks like old twitter.

Now that you’re eating cake and leaning right with one eye closed, here are the changes (taken directly from Twitter’s official blog):

• Click any Tweet in your timeline to expand it to see photos, videos, retweets, favorites, and more.Twitter.com shortcut: You can quickly close all expanded Tweets by pressing “L” (as in Larry) on your keyboard.

• Connect is your way to keep conversations going. It’s the place to see who has followed or mentioned you, or retweeted or favorited one of your Tweets.Twitter.com shortcut: Type “GC” (as in “Go Connect”), to jump to the Connect tab.

• Discover lets you tap into a stream of useful and entertaining information, customized just for you. When you use Discover, you’ll see results reflecting your interests. These are based on your current location, what you follow and what’s happening in the world.Twitter.com shortcut: “GD” (as in “Go Discover”) takes you to the Discover tab. If you want to go directly to Activity, enter “GA”.

• Embed Tweets on your website by copying and pasting one line of code.

• Take a tour of the new experience.

• Check out the new Twitter brand pages from accounts like @NPRNews, @Audiand others.

• By the way, you can see more shortcuts by typing “?” when you’re on Twitter.com.

 My final word:

I’m getting used to new Twitter. Like the magnet on my mom’s refrigerator says “It’s not home sweet home, adjust!” Tweeps, at least we’re in this together! Happy tweeting.

There’s Something About Tweeps: Part II

Congratulations, you’ve built your following and everyone loves you! Yay!

Now that you’ve had a little over two seconds to bask in your greatness, I have to burst your bubble. Sorry, but I have to be honest! The truth is that the real work begins now that you officially have a Twitter house full of Tweeps to maintain. Look on the bright side, at least this housekeeping is virtual!

Each and every Twitter day is going to be different. While the vast majority of my Tweeps work full-time jobs, if time wasn’t an issue, the ideal Twitter day would closely resemble a typical day in real-life:

Morning: Greet the ones you love! That means giving and receiving plenty of “Good mornings,” “How ya doings?” and “Are you feeling betters?” (because at least one of your Tweeps will be sick). Have you ever played “pit and peak” at the dinner table? Basically, everyone goes around and says the peak of their day and the pit of their day. I like it because I personally think that the good and the bad aspects of my day are equally important. This is a great way to check in with my Tweeps while concurrently sharing a little bit about what’s going on in my life.

It goes something like this:

“Tweeps! How are you all today? You know the drill, got any good news? Bad news?”

“My good news: I FINALLY finished the book that I was reading. I also found my debit card, it was under the couch! #SworeILookedThere”

“Bad news: Layla ate pork rolls that had toothpicks in them! After paying a fortune in vet bills, we found them in a pile, expertly removed!”

*I would also recommend following back new followers and sending welcome messages in the mornings too.*

Afternoon: After you come back from lunch, or let’s be realistic, during lunch, try to have more meaningful conversations with your Tweeps. Haha, forget spending lunch with you coworkers, spend it with your Tweeps! Don’t deny it, you know that you like us better!

Night: After you’ve done more tweeting with a different batch of Tweeps (the ones who reside on the opposite side of the world), it’s time to clean up before bed. While it’s not something that you have to do, it’s something that you should do. It’s a lot like brushing your teeth.

Twitter cleaning entails two major things: “polishing” your lists (I’ll cover lists in a separate post) and unfollowing those who have stopped following you or those who have never bothered to follow you back in the first place. (I personally use http://www.friendorfollow.com).

A note on unfollowing:

It sucks, plain and simple. Someone was either using you to bolster their following numbers or they genuinely don’t like what you have to say. It’s hurtful and it’s hard not to take personally (esp. when it was someone that you had previously vibed with). When it appears to be a case of I-don’t-like-you-anymore versus an I-want-to-have-a-huge-following-so-I-look-cool case, I drive myself crazy with whos, whats, wheres, and whys.

Who do they think they are?

What did I say to offend them?

Where do they get off?

Why would they just stop following me like that?

In the end, you need to get over it because they are SO not worth it. P.S. Not only are there plenty of Tweeps in the proverbial Twitter sea, but the vast majority of us, your current Tweeps, still adore you!

Call_Me_Ridiculous: My 7 Facts (VB Award)

Woo!!!!!!!!!!!! A HUGE thank you to my good friend, Chris James, for nominating me for the Versatile Blogger Award! The rules are that you have to thank the person who nominated you and tell them 7 facts about yourself! Also, you need to pass on this award to 15 other bloggers (see if you made the list below!).

Chris, your 7 facts were hilarious; I’m going to do my best to return the favor and entertain you. While everyone may mistake me for boring simply because I’m bookish, my life is actually pretty ridiculous:

1) I do the sign of the cross whenever I kill a bug. I feel bad about killing them, but they are frankly too vile to let live. If they come in my house, it’s on. I do the sign of the cross as an apology and as an I-hope-you-come-back-as-something-less-disgusting gesture.

2) I’m obsessed with Lucille Ball. Lucille Ball Treasures by Cindy De La Hoz is one of my favorite books. I grew up watching I Love Lucy and am proud to say that I’m A LOT like her (real Lucy and TV Lucy).

3) Speaking of being like Lucy, I’m all about half-baked plans and schemes that always blow up in my face. My first year of college, my friend and I were falling asleep while studying (we had a bio exam the next day). We were in the dining room of our dorm, so I suggested that we get up and move around a little bit. This ultimately turned into shoving, then “fake” hitting, etc. With my luck, I ended up swerving right into her fist. It was a total accident but I took a straight jab to the mouth. I had to go to the infirmary in the wee hours of the morning and had a fat lip for two weeks. Yeah, try explaining that to your study of women and gender professors; I’m sure that they secretly thought that my boyfriend was beating me.

4) While I have a zillion and five cousins that I grew up next door to, I am an only child.

5) Everyone whose wedding I’ve participated in (flower girl, bridesmaid) has gotten divorced. I’m in another one in October, fingers crossed that they make it!

6) As a child, I dressed up in the weirdest Halloween costumes known to man. When I told my parents that I wanted to be things like a ghost-duck or a rainbow-with-a-cloud-and-sun, they facilitated that BS! Instead of saying maybe you should be something more normal, they had a family friend custom make the above. Yes, I was both of those things. No wonder why I ended up a writer.

7) I have a star named after me. It’s one of the best gifts that I’ve ever been given, holla International Star Registry!

Love-fest 2012:

A lot of my favorite bloggers have already been awarded the Versatile Blogger Award, so don’t be offended if you’re not on this list! Luckily, there are plenty of fabulous blogs to choose from!

1) 3Rs @JillBarville ”wRiting, Running and Reading” I know, the title of her blog has already got you ready to click. We all know that I love writing and reading, but running? Yeah, not so much. Despite the activity that can’t be named, Jill’s blog is one of my favs.

2) A Writer’s Life @JustinBog Although I’m totally biased because Justin is a fellow German shepherd lover, his blog would totally rock even if he didn’t post those ADORABLE pics of his sheps!

3) Bert Carson @BertCarson You may know him for putting together one of the best Triberr tribes ever, but Bert is a talent in his own right. I love reading his blog because his posts never fail to entertain.

4) Caught in the Dreaming @millism In addition to being my bookish counterpart, Adam is also a writer and editor. He has his hands in a little bit of everything, and his blog posts reflect his myriad projects. Long story short, his blog is a blast to read.

5) In the Writing Groove @writinggroove Ms. Hall should change her name to Dr. Feelgood because her blog is like therapy! Everything about it is positive, honest, funny, and informative. Her posts make me smile and give me something to think about.

6) Tina Boscha @TinaBoscha Tina’s blog is warm and inviting, which is exactly the way her personality is. After reading her posts, I “click away” (I slay myself) feeling like I just read something worthwhile. She’s a damn fine blogger and author (I’m currently reading River in the Sea).

7) Inspiration for Creation @beccajcampbell  If you think that you’ve got a lot going on, meet Becca! Still, she always manages to write with a passion that is contagious. She’s an all-around rad chick.

8) Intrigue and Delight @GayleCochrane You will LOVE Gayle! While she is fun, fun, fun, she also has a heart of gold. She’ll definitely let you know what’s up in the romance department!

9) Kat’s Blog @writekatanthony Kat is entertaining, period. It doesn’t matter which subject matter she tackles (writing, pop culture, apps), it’s all good. Plus, she adds -y to words too (“in-between-y”)! #LoveIt

10) Linus and Bubba Books @LB_Books Sharayah is such an amazing person and blogger. This is by far one of my favorite book blogs. In addition to reviews, there are fantastic posts of the bookish persuasion (Beloved Children’s Authors Who Also Wrote Some Other Stuff).

11) Smoky Talks… @SmokyZeidel I love Smoky’s perspective. I find her to be both funny and sharp. I want her to “talk” forever (see what I did there?)!

12) The Bookish Libraria @TheBookishDame She seriously gives me a run for my money in the “bookish” department! As a book lover and women’s rights advocate, she’s a lady after my own heart.

13) The Butter Bottom Blog @bobbutterbottom Who doesn’t love the antics of a stay-at-home dad? He also designs yoga pants! Need I say more?

14) Claude Nougat @claudenougat I’m new to Claude’s blog, but I totally dig it! It’s intellectually stimulating, well written, and fun!

15) Christina Carson @CarsonCanada This is also a blog that I’m fairly new to, but I really like what Christina has to say. Her posts are thought-provoking and serene. Keep it up, Christina!

**The rules say that I have to nominate a specific blogger so I technically can’t give the Versatile Blogger Award to The Ballpoint Revue (@BallpointNews). However, it is such a fantastic blog! Susan and David work so hard to help everyday writers become even better.**

*I don’t think any of you have already been given this, I’m sorry if you have!*

There’s Something About Tweeps: Part 1

Tweep (noun): Someone who follows you on Twitter. Your Tweeps are your “Twitter people” AKA your “Tweeple.”

Just like Mary (Cameron Diaz) in There’s Something About Mary, there’s something about your Tweeps that makes you keep logging in for more. I have 3,398 of them, but I’m still excited whenever more want to follow me! Truth be told, I have a full-on Sally Fields “They really like me!” moment.

In Part 1, I want to discuss how to go about getting, welcoming, and following back (or not following back) the newest additions of your Twitterverse!

Finding Followers:

Call_Me_Nostalgic: When I first joined Twitter, I really didn’t have any following criteria. If I liked your feed, I followed you and prayed that you would follow my fledgling feed back. (God, my first week’s tweets were awful!) Long story short, it didn’t take long for me to get addicted to the rush that comes with being followed back. When someone actually initiated the following, I was beyond stoked (even if it was an SEO person or a gigantic business). It didn’t matter; they liked me! Eventually, I took my own advice and was just my bookish, slightly corny self. It’s amazing how fast things fell into place and how quickly people started to follow me. Ever since my following passed the 1,000 point, I haven’t actively followed multiple people; I typically just follow back and no, I do not autofollow. Recently my Twitter-world turned upside down when several of my newest Tweeps admitted that they almost didn’t follow me because my numbers were too intimidating. Me? Intimidating? When did that happen? Never be intimidated to follow anyone, we all started at the 0 follower mark!

Ways to find Tweeps:

• Best: Creep your Tweeps’ Tweeps. Whether you look at their lists, browse who they’re following, read the conversations on their feeds, or just take their #FF (#FollowFriday) suggestions to heart. Your Tweeps are awesome so chances are that their friends will be too.
• Ok: Use hashtags to meet like-minded people. Think of the things that define you; for example, I would find Tweeps by using hashtags like #GermanShepherd, #AmWriting, #RiverInTheSea (book I’m currently reading), etc. When you search for these hashtags, you’ll be able to see a lot of other tweets where they’ve been used.
• Worst: Twitter does its best to tell you who to follow, but it fails miserably. If you go to your Home tab and look at the right-hand panel, Twitter provides you with “Who to follow” suggestions. You would think that it would be a good option because it bases the suggestions on who your friends follow, but the suggestions typically lack quality. (It gives you celebrities, businesses local to a specific area, etc.)

Being Followed Back:

There is no way to ensure that people will follow you back. This is a complicated subject, but I’ve broken it down into some simple Dos & Don’ts.

Dos:

1. Do be yourself. Like I said, be yourself and the rest will follow. You shouldn’t go looking for “interesting” things to tweet. (Inspirational quotes are signs of a Twitter newbie.) You’re already an interesting person who reads and does interesting things. Tweet about those things naturally, as you do them.
2. Do talk to other people. I never follow pages that don’t have any @mention conversations with other people. It means that they’re into themselves and will inevitably never talk to you. #ForgetThem.
3. Do build rapport immediately before or after you have followed them. If you RT the tweet that made you follow them in the first place or say something nice about their rockin’ blog, they are 100% more likely to follow you.
4. Do have a reasonable follower to following ratio. People are less likely to follow you if you are following a lot more people than are following you (you look like a spammer, or appear to be uninteresting). Also, unless you’re a celebrity or authority of some kind, there’s no reason why you should be following only a small portion of those who are following you. There’s a misconception that it makes you look cool when, in reality, it only makes you look pompous and out of touch.

Don’ts:

1. Don’t come on too strong. Again, Twitter is just like real-life! In real-life, if someone is trying crazy hard to be your friend, you get suspicious, right? You can’t help but think that they have an ulterior motive and must want something from you. Basically, don’t go crazy with Do #3.
2. Don’t be rude — and please don’t be self-deprecating! I hate when people tweet me things like, “I know I’m not that interesting, but will you follow back?” Yeah, that really makes me want to follow you. Also, never TELL someone to follow you back! Who the hell are you to tell me what to do? Seriously, it has the opposite effect. Make it a question and use “please.”
3. Don’t put #FollowBack, #TeamFollowBack, etc. anywhere in your tweets or in your bio. Twitter is all about being genuine and honestly, the latter makes you look like a spammer. People will realize that you’re #TeamFolllowBack when you actually follow them back.
4. Don’t just @mention and RT people, mix it up! People want to follow original content, they want to follow you! Make sure that at least 1/3 of your tweets are your personal thoughts and observations.

Welcoming Your Tweeps:

The Twitter community is split over welcome and thank you messages. I have Tweeps who HATE them, and I have Tweeps who think they’re sweet. What do I think? I think that, like thank you cards, they are a nice, albeit time-consuming, thing to give out.

Here’s what I do:

If you initiate the following and I decide to follow you back, I DM you this welcome message:

“Thank you for following me! In addition to reviews, my tweets are primarily about books and words. Enjoy the chaos that is my Twitter feed!”

It thanks you, lets you know what I’m interested in, warns you that some of my tweets are of a more random nature, and signals that I’m kind of fun! It’s very me and I like it. I don’t autofollow so I individually copy and paste that message. I would use everyone’s name to make it more personal, as I have in the past, but my current message has maxed out the character limits.

If I initiate following someone and they follow me back, I DM them something like:

“Thanks for following me back, Karen! I loved your blog post, “Writing When You Don’t Have Time,” suggestion #3 was great!”

They followed you back, so you should make a good first impression by writing something a little more personal.

*If you don’t plan on following someone back, do not send them a welcome DM or tweet of any kind! It’s just rude! It’s like saying something like, “While I don’t care what you have to say, thanks for caring about what I have to say!” This is another reason why I think that automated welcome messages are bad!*

Get your Tweep situation down, and get Twitter down. You’re officially on your way!